The Book of Luke

As a tribute to this post, and this person, I am listening to

Live's "Dam at Otter Creek," as I write.

You can listen too if you'd like.

Luke. My first love.

It was the summer of 2000. We were all young and rebellious, yet our actions were innocent overall. I was a huge tom boy then, still discovering who I was and who I wanted to become as an individual, and I had met this particular group of friends at school. We spent our time playing guns in the ravine, sneaking into abandon buildings, and when the nights were hot enough, breaking into the local pool and swimming in our underwear without a care in the world. We passed the time outside of school watching action movies like Braveheart and listening to bands like Rob Zombie and Live.

I miss those days.

Luke was the leader of the pack. He could fix any car, he had mastered the art of jiujitsu by the age of 13, and he had his own room in his parent's garage, which was a dream to all of us who looked up to him. We became best friends immediately. I was always considered one of the guys, so when he wanted to go to the pool even though nobody else could go, I didn't think twice about it, and as soon as my mom went to bed, I immediately snuck out of my house to meet him.

I remember floating around the pool on my back and staring up at the stars. It was such a clear night, warm and heavy with humidity. We shared good conversation, usually about art and religion and bodies and souls. He called me beautiful, which nobody had ever done before, and we shared our first kiss. We became boyfriend and girlfriend that night.

Years later now, I want to tell him, through this silly blog, that I love him more than he will ever know. Sadly I'm afraid I will never get that chance. He is married and expecting his first child with a woman that he met immediately after we broke up. It's a sad story that I need to let go. I'm simply happy that we had our short time together and we remain close friends. To this day, if I ever need any advice or I don't know where to turn, I know Luke has a shoulder for me to lean on and a word of wisdom to throw my way.

Luke and the guys are the friendships I will have for the rest of my life. They mean the world to me. We grew up together; learned hard lessons and learned how to love together. It's a crazy life we all lead, and I'm grateful that we have each other.

"To give light to them that sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace."
St. Luke, 1. 79

Luke, you are my light. Thank you for everything you have shown me.